i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
