Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
