I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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