sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Watching her eat just hurts me
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize
