My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Randomize
