STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
Randomize
