Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Just got booked to do a bachelorette party for a polygamist wedding. And notice I only text you to rub things in your face and show you my life shits on yours. Daily.
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
You may now shotgun with the bride
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
I lost all interest the day she banged that guy in the Amazon parking lot. That's a special kinda whore.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
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