ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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