you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Randomize
