no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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