Plan B is the new Plan A
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
Randomize