So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
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