Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
i showed up really high and was trying to not be,so in order to not seem high, i got plastered
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
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