just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
