eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
