i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
So I'm really hungover walking to work and these douches from comcast on bikes ask if they can take a picture with me to show that they're doing their job. The picture: me, this chick from comcast, i'm holding a 2 ft. pixie stick, a comcast flyer and i'm puking in the parking lot. sounds like their doing a good job!
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
