yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
There are twenty thousand men on this campus, please have sex with someone who isn't my drug dealer
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Fuck. I did it again. I plugged in my toaster and walked away thinking it needed to preheat. I am dumb.
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
Randomize
