well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
Panties = found
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
