So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
What a dumb baby whore.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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