dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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