S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
