He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize