so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Someone painted a weed leaf on my leg with red paint. Or blood. I hope paint.
Holy fuck just found a used tampon in the leg of my pants. it's not paint. It's. Not. Paint.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Even my fuck buddy told me I needed a boyfriend. Fml.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize