I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
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