I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
