I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
