Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
