whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
i sat alone in my bed and ate pizza and garlic fingers. The icing on the cake was hearing your moans from down the hall.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I walked in and saw him spread eagle on the couch beatin it, while he just pet the dog that sat there and stared. mom was pissed
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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