pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I went 670% over budget on my vacation. My accountant would flip if he weren't me.
How the fuck do you have so much free time?
Polyphasic sleep schedule.
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Randomize
