I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
