so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
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