And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
try to milk me bitch
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