yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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