Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
whose ass print is on the piano?
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
