Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Randomize