yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
I may or may not be drunk driving a golf cart. Vegaaaassssssss.
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
I just dropped macaroni right down my cleavage. For the sake of our future, I'm really banking on this being a turn on for you.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
