super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
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