escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
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