Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Fuck going to see The Hunger Games tonight. The only thing I'm hungry for is some dick. Let's go to the bar.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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