somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
Randomize
