I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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