I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I almost went home with him but then my hydroxycut fell out of my purse at the bar and I ran away
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
