the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize