Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize