you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Randomize
