We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
