waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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