sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
Randomize