idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
If I hear the phrase 'these unprecedented times' one more time I'm putting my foot up someone's ass.
Randomize
