I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
She left me with blue balls so I jerked off on her french toast in the morning.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Can you pick up from work today? There's a surprise for you on the bed and I haven't gone blind which is positive.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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